Thursday, July 2, 2009

She is....

insanely beautiful. Unfortunately, it is difficult to capture her pretty face on camera. It takes all of her energy just to hold her head up. Then she has nystagmus of the eyes (meaning they bounce all over the place) which makes her look cross eyed at times........ but when I snapped this picture it literally took my breath away. It made me cry. In this picture, I can imagine my girl not having a disability. Just a "regular" 14 year old girl. I tell myself everyday not to go there. She is who she is.......but that thought creeps into my head at times and nestles there for awhile.......
Everyday I lay eyes on her, my heart aches. She is vulnerable, totally dependent on me for her every need......she is innocent, has nothing but love to give to those who want it, and works so hard for every little thing, things we all take for granted, like holding our heads up. I am filled with love, worry, admiration, wonder, and pain for her. I wonder everyday what her future holds...........

I do know this......she was given to me for a reason, and everyday I try to do right by her. When you know her, she touches your heart and leaves a permanent mark there........she is truly beautiful inside and out.

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Supplies: Noel Mignon's Rise and Shine kit.


JUST a REMINDER: Blog candy drawing this Sunday! Go HERE if you haven't put your name in yet!
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48 comments:

  1. Julie Tucker-WolekJuly 2, 2009 at 6:41 AM

    This TOUCHES my heart in sooooooooooooooooooo many ways!!!! She is a HOT SUPER MODEL I tell U!!!! GORGEOUS! :):):):):):):):):):):)

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  2. mudmavenJuly 2, 2009 at 6:44 AM

    This is totally awesome! Great picture - great subject though! What a total sweetheart. ~chris

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  3. AmyJuly 2, 2009 at 6:53 AM

    what a beautiful tribute to Cortney! I think you should journal your words here onto a coordinating page for this scrapbook page!

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  4. UnknownJuly 2, 2009 at 7:13 AM

    Michele this is just stunning!! What a wonderful photo and beautiful thoughts - you're the BEST mother!

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  5. Stef HJuly 2, 2009 at 7:27 AM

    she is gorgeous. and your love for her shines thru in your story and has brought tears to my eyes. i want to hug the both of you! she is gorgeous.

    have a safe & happy holiday.

    hugs,

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  6. YvetteJuly 2, 2009 at 7:29 AM

    What a blessing she is to you and others! Cortney is God's love bundled up in a BEAUTIFUL package sent to you! How AWESOME!!! LOVE the pic!!! :)

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  7. CricketJuly 2, 2009 at 7:34 AM

    Michele, your layout and words today are so totally moving! Your daughter is more than beautiful in so many ways and she is so lucky to have been given you for a mother!!

    Smiles,

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  8. ~amy~July 2, 2009 at 7:40 AM

    Oh Michele, what a beautiful layout of your gorgeous daughter...you are a fabulous momma...

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  9. June HouckJuly 2, 2009 at 7:56 AM

    What a lovely tribute to your truly beautiful daughter. Wonderful picture and LO :)

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  10. UnknownJuly 2, 2009 at 8:01 AM

    That is a beautiful picture, but like you said, beauty is so much deeper than our outward appearances. She is so lucky to have you! It can't be easy knowing that someone depends that much on you every single day. I've been helping my 18 yr old daughter recover from a burn injury, and I can't believe how strange it feels to have her depend so much on me again. So I have a whole new appreciation for your situation.

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  11. Tracy.HJuly 2, 2009 at 8:30 AM

    She is simply stunning! You all made me cry...in a good way. :0)

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  12. Charmaine (CharmWarm)July 2, 2009 at 8:35 AM

    THis is just gorgeous, Michele and you made me cry with this beautiful post.

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  13. RietJuly 2, 2009 at 9:11 AM

    Wowww Michele,what beautiful.

    hugs Riet.x

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  14. GabrielaJuly 2, 2009 at 9:13 AM

    You've succeeded in getting the tears to well up in my eyes. Your post tugs, no, pulls at my heartstrings and that lump in my throat? Where the hell did that come from? Your daughter is stunning. I can also imagine how much she fills your heart with joy and pride. What a beautiful post.

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  15. Lana ClarkeJuly 2, 2009 at 9:31 AM

    Michele you are so devoted to your beautiful daughter whose beauty shines from within. Her smile is so warm and happy on her beautiful face.
    Hugs
    Lana x

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  16. TraceyJuly 2, 2009 at 10:17 AM

    This is stunning Michele and your words put tears in my eyes. You are absolutely blessed to have such a beautiful girl (inside & out) to share your world with.

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  17. Vicki GJuly 2, 2009 at 12:00 PM

    You are right, she was given to you for all the right reasons, your patience, your tolerance and your love. I am sure she is as blessed to have you as you are to have her


    Vicki

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  18. AUsome momJuly 2, 2009 at 12:10 PM

    Absolutely stunning photo! Your daughter is really beautiful and I know you are so very proud of her. Stunning, just stunning.

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  19. Crafty ConnieJuly 2, 2009 at 1:00 PM

    Truly beautiful picture and your thoughts are amazing. You are both blessed to be given each other. God always has a reason.

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  20. JocelynJuly 2, 2009 at 1:43 PM

    What a touching LO and now you have tears streaming down my cheeks!!!!! Just to think of the struggles that she faces...but then knowing that she has you as her Angel!!!!!! I just adore the pic and I can see why this one holds a special place in your heart!!! Thank you for sharing with us!!

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  21. Suzie QJuly 2, 2009 at 1:44 PM

    Hiya,
    Thanks so much for taking the time to comment on my blog i am touched.I will definintely give your advice a try.
    You sound an incredibly busy lady and all your creations are beautiful.Your daughter is very pretty and you have written some beautiful things about her.
    Thank you
    Suzie Qx

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  22. CreativeMishJuly 2, 2009 at 4:42 PM

    What a beautiful picture! You're a special Mama for a special girl!

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  23. Rose AnnJuly 2, 2009 at 5:37 PM

    Totally gorgeous, Michele...and your post is so touching and beautiful. Brought tears to my eyes. Hugs!!

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  24. Pam SpeidelJuly 2, 2009 at 8:05 PM

    Michele, this is such a beautiful photo of Cortney! and your layout and sentiment are equally as beautiful...and heartwarming!

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  25. Basement StamperJuly 2, 2009 at 8:36 PM

    You're writing is so touching and so loving. This picture and layout is absolutely beautiful, thanks so much for sharing!

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  26. AnonymousJuly 2, 2009 at 9:13 PM

    What a beautiful picture of Cortney! This is one of the best pictures I have seen of her. She is very photogenic.
    From your posts, I know you are so proud of your children.
    Linda Peterson

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  27. Kathy JonesJuly 2, 2009 at 10:28 PM

    Reading this I want to give you a huge hug Michele! This is a beautiful page you've created for her!!

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  28. theneonJuly 2, 2009 at 11:33 PM

    She is beautiful -- and she has a beautiful Mom full of good stuff! You are so generous to share your thoughts here. Thanks for coming by to visit me, I am so glad you did so I could come meet Courtney.

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  29. DianeJuly 3, 2009 at 6:07 AM

    She is one super lookin lady and is blessed to have you as her Mother!!! You must be so proud of her!!!

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  30. JenniferJuly 3, 2009 at 6:19 AM

    Maybe God needed to remind you how special YOU are to her and to us followers. Your strength and courage remains in tact everyday. You are allowed to feel your thoughts and share them too. After all you are a talented cardmaking (sentimental)scrapbooker right?! ; )
    Thank you for sharing a very vulnerable peek into your life and heart. I didn't expect to get all choked up when I went blog hopping this morning but that's what makes these so great. We are all here to listen and chime in when we are needed. I hope you have a peaceful day with your family.

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  31. StampinCathyJuly 3, 2009 at 7:00 AM

    This is just PRICELESS! She is beautiful and just love the page.

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  32. Amy JohnsonJuly 3, 2009 at 7:16 AM

    Reading this lovely tribute to your daughter really touched my heart. I admire your honesty and your deep love for your daughter. Someday in heaven your daughter will be exactly what you envision: because she will have a new and perfect body. I have so much respect for you. I can't even imagine doing what you do everyday: I am such a selfish person. The page is gorgeous! Its such a fabulous tribute. I love it!

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  33. lasonaJuly 3, 2009 at 8:52 AM

    My daughter (Hannah) is 10, she was born with spina bifida, meaning somewhere along the the spine it did not fuse together causing a number of different problems, she is bright,intelligent, and does depend on a wheelchair although she has feeling in her legs, but she had crossing of the eyes and sometimes focusing them as well, she had surgery to correct the problem which so helped but when she is tired I see it..I feel people like me and you, we have to be special as well for God to think that we could handle such a responsibility, and as hard as it gets sometimes, I keep it real, and know that I have been blessed, your story touched me and I hope you don't mind that I got so personal, but today, God led me to your blog and your daughter (who by the way is Beautiful), have made my morning, may the Lord continue to keep you strong, just always know we are BLESSED!!Glory to Gos

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  34. Card CreationsJuly 3, 2009 at 10:44 AM

    This is an awesome picture and layout. It brings Cortney's inner beauty out for everyone to see!

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  35. QweenDaviaJuly 3, 2009 at 11:40 AM

    wow this is a wonderful page! I am at a loss for words!

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  36. TilJuly 3, 2009 at 5:15 PM

    Beautiful LO!!!

    I am a mother of TWO developmentally delayed Girls so I love when you talk about Courtney because I am so there with you. We are BLESSED MOTHERS ! Very Lucky. I used to say "Why, God Why?" and wonder why not only One but TWO!! Well after MUCH prayer adn thought , It hit me like a TON of bricks.

    Of ALL the Women of this World, God handpicked ME out of everyone to be there Mom!!!! How Lucky is that? He trusted ME to take care of them because He Specially designed them to be in my life........... So feel so very happy and BLESSED your were handselected to be her Proud Mom!!!! I am sure she is so happy your Her mom!

    (Hope I didn't upset you?)

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  37. Maria MatterJuly 3, 2009 at 6:30 PM

    Eyes are the window to the soul....Beautiful!!!!

    And I can tell you are a beautiful person Michele!
    take care
    Blessings, Maria

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  38. CarlaJuly 3, 2009 at 8:19 PM

    She IS beautiful!! You have such talent! Not just for making beautiful LOs, but for expressing yourself so perfectly. Thanks so much for the inspiration!

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  39. The Mama MonkeyJuly 3, 2009 at 8:46 PM

    What a beautiful tribute to your daughter, both in your words and your art.

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  40. ElaineJuly 3, 2009 at 9:05 PM

    You and your daughter are both beautiful in EVERY way, Michele! Your post brought a tear to my eye. I have also thought the same thing of my son - though he can hold his head up, there are things that impact him significantly - things that so many others take for granted. My heart sends you many hugs - you're a treasure and sweet Cortney is a beautiful rose. xxoo Elaine

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  41. Heather "Hev"July 4, 2009 at 9:19 AM

    As soon as I saw the photo I was captivated by her eyes :)

    You can see her beauty with her smile too.

    Love to you all

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  42. Heather P.July 4, 2009 at 3:51 PM

    Wow, just wow! Simply gorgeous!!

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  43. MichelleJuly 4, 2009 at 4:10 PM

    Michele, the look in her eyes, the smile on her face, no matter how slight. Every time I see a picture of her, wow, it just stops my heart for a second. She is beautiful and you can see the spirit in her eyes.

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  44. dasimondsJuly 5, 2009 at 8:36 PM

    This post really touched my
    heart also. You are such a
    wonderful Mom...I see from
    pictures..the love in your face.
    I hear from your post...the love
    in your heart!
    This is a Beautiful picture of
    Cortney.
    You have a gift for writing..
    Thank you for sharing these moments with all your cyber-friends...and God Bless!

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  45. mary stuartJuly 6, 2009 at 5:48 AM

    So beautiful!
    You are an awesome mom...
    and inspirational in life and creating art!
    Thank you for your lovely thoughts you shared with us
    may God bless you and your lovely family.

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  46. AimeeJuly 6, 2009 at 8:20 PM

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts and your gorgeous LO of your beautiful daughter. You just wrote everything that I feel for my daughter, Emily. Please keep sharing!

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  47. Libby HicksonJuly 12, 2009 at 1:42 AM

    What a beautiful photo, gorgeous scrapbook page and wonderful blog post. I think you make me a little teary more than any other blogger. You are such an amazing mom!!!

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  48. AnonymousOctober 6, 2009 at 6:55 PM

    OMG! Thank you for saying what was in my heart! You made me cry!

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Thank you for taking the time to comment! I really appreciate it!