Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Another little notecard! (And a little advice needed...)

Lisa Zappa sent me the cutest little images in a card she sent a little while ago. So I am not sure who these hedgehogs are from....Penny Black maybe? I colored them in with my Copics. I added dimensional snow and crystal flakes that I bought from Michaels. I the paper is SU! Kraft and KI Memories Christmas pack. I cut the card using my Spellbinders. I added a couple of dew drops in the corners, inked up the edges, and added a pretty silver ribbon.

I could use some uplifting words today. My ten year old son told me that everyone at school ignores him and people make fun of him for being "weird." He cried today while we were out to eat. He proceeded to tell me that he could shout across the room and no one would bother with him. It nearly broke my heart! He isn't an athletic kid at all, really more intellectual. He loves the History Channel over Cartoon Network! He writes his own books, wants to be an architect, loves to scrap with me, bake, color, play LEGOS when every other kid has already decided that they are too "old" for that stuff. I have taken him to a few docs who told me that he didn't seem to be depressed, just had a high anxiety level. I don't' know if I should talk to his teacher.....take him back to the doc, just let it be for awhile......Can't one of my kids be easy? Being a kid is really tough....

17 comments:

Bevie Pearl said...

My son was exactly like that in grade school. In 5th grade he had one friend......finally....and that guy was like him. Now he has so many friends, he is never home. I just want to say that it will work out for him. He is a smart guy with alot of potential...his potential will really shine later in his school career...believe me it will. One thing my friend said (who had a son like that) was get him in band. He will fit in in band. Try an instrument...make him take an instrument. Band is a good group to belong in. HTH

Jessrose21 said...

I'll never understand people who have glorified memories of childhood. I think it's way tougher to be a kid than an adult! I don't really have any advice, though the band idea sounds like a good one. Theatre is another genre in which people are more easily accepted. I was the intellectual/musical type, too, and had only a couple good friends. College was the place where I really felt like I belonged. I hope your son finds his niche soon!

Flossie's Follies said...

This card is so cute. Your son has his own beat and path, it is tough at this age, if you don't conform it is hard. Maybe if he joins a local club or activity that interests him he will find kids that share his interest, maybe volunteering. I know it is hard right.

sophia landry said...

Gorgeous card, and I definitely agree that these are some good alternatives to help him find his niche.

Colleen Kramer said...

Card is great! Ditto to other comments here...there's something about that age, especially for boys. We started exploring other groups, especially outside of school. Maybe drawing lessons? You know the other thing that helped was that my husband started having our son work out with him. Some form of exercise every day, walking in the yard..shooting hoops...riding bikes... It helped use up some of that anxiety. Might be worth a shot. Here's praying for you both!

Rosella said...

It breaks my heart go hear that your son is unhappy. You have received some great advice already. I will be praying for you and your son.

Amy said...

TALK TO THE SCHOOL! That's my advise. I've been there, done that, and it works. They have to know what's happening to make sure it stops. Every single time. Your son has to know that you'll do anything in your power to help him. As long as they know wht's happening, they can be on the lookout for the teasing behaviors and stop the kids in their track the minute they start. My oldest son had the same thing happen, all through elementary, then in middle school (I'm sad to say it's only going to get worse, middle school kids are ruthless to EVERYONE). The year my son was to be a 9th grader, the school changed to a middle school concept. So elementary was k-5, middle school was 6-8, and high school was 9-12. My son's dean was actually quite happy my son would be going to 9th grade at the high school and not at the junior high. She said things should work themselves out in the high school, that sort of stuff appeared to get better at the high school level. Well, I'm happy to report she was 100% right. He has lots of good friends and he's a junior now. No teasing (other than the normal stuff) and I couldn't be happier. Hang in there. But you've got to let him know everyday it's "THEM" that has the problem, not "HIM". Tell him he's wonderful as he is. Don't for one minute let him think the other kids are right. If you want any more advise, you know you can email me. Hang in there Mom! I cried myself to sleep MANY times over this sort of stuff.

Hugs,
Amy

SpAzzGiRL said...

at least Kyle has friends in the neighborhood, it could be worse, you could have my kid.
I unfortunately had the talk a long time ago about "friends" and "acquaintances" and how not everyone is gonna be your best bud. Also coming from the other end of the spectrum, we talk and talk about making yourself happy. This has helped.
But we still have no friends either. Well, except Kyle. LOL
Just make sure no one is teasing him at school, otherwise no one can make someone be his friend, kwim?
And again, he DOES have friends around the 'hood so make sure he hooks up with them over the break, plus I am sure the school break will make him MUCH happier.
Love this card, your coloring is way better than mine...I'm jealous!

Kimberly said...

I agree with what Amy said. Talk to the teacher. I tell Ashly all the time that when the girls are picking on her, it's not her, it's them, and they are probably just jealous of ashly, and to cover up there own insecurities they make fun of her instead. Besides, who wants to be normal? Weird is good!!! I hope things get better!

Chris Scrappin and Stampin in Texas said...

Love the cute card.

About your son, kids can be so cruel. My son was also very creative, into the History Channel,not athletic, building things with Legos and cardboard(since he was 3)..He is now in High School and has been a tag (talented and gifted ) since 3rd grade and now is on the Varsity swim team. Some kids don't like to group compete and this is okay, they like to do one on one things. he will find his way! happy holidays. Chris

asela said...

I'm sorry to hear what you are going through. It's so hard as a mom, our hearts break. I totally understand. Big hugs.

Hope you have a blessed Christmas season.

Nancy Grant said...

So sorry to here what's going on. I feel for both of you and I wish I had some good advice but I am at\ loss.

Thinking of you,
~nance

Rose Ann said...

Such a cute card...and I'm so sorry about your son. Kids can be so mean. My boys get picked on it school too. I can totally relate. Mean people stink!!

Looks like some very good advice up here!^

Michelle said...

Michele, your post made me cry. There is no such thing as an "easy" kid, but it's so difficult for parents to watch their kids struggle. Kids can be so mean.

Jenn said...

I can totally relate to this heartbreaking story Michelle, My DD crystal has aspergers and suffered the same struggles in school with the other kids, all my kids now homeschool, being special needs and having weird schedules it works best for them. But dd is now 16 and started homeschooling when she was 12 , she used to eat lunch in the bathroom alone :( so sad how kids can be so cruel :( I hope it gets better for your son ! Have a WONDERFUL holiday !!!!

Chris P MN said...

Sorry I saw this sooo late - I have a 13 yr old boy that has always had lots of friends. Suddenly last spring 2 of his buddies since they were 3 didn't call anymore & never wanted to hang out when he called them - he was devastated. (The tough thing is, ZI'm very good friends with the moms & they couldn't get an answer when they asked their sons why) We had a rough summer at home - thank goodness for the 1 year younger neighbor boy! Then, when school started, he reconnected with a couple of boys that he knew from elementary school & it has been wonderful! They are great, well-rounded kids who genuinely appreciate my son for the person he is!

I guess I'm trying to say that things will work out for him - just make sure he knows that he is loved. And encourage him to try something new - band or an art class - something that interests him.
But I would mention it to his teacher - sometimes they are so busy, they don't realize the teasing or ignoring is going on. She/he can keep an eye on it & perhaps encourage friendships or group projects. Good Luck - it WILL work out! (Great card, by the way!)

Deb said...

My opinion as a teacher is that you need to talk to the teacher(s), just so everyone is aware of what is happening. With so many kids and so much to teach, we are often unaware of the ripples that are quiet but run deep.

Perhaps your son needs a good friend in his class. There is usually in every class a child that you can buddy up with anyone else if that is what is needed.

Sometimes the teacher needs to step in too and make sure that the child is being recognized for his/her special accomplishments and talents without making it seem like he is the "teacher's pet." Most teachers are pretty good about this - we just need reminded sometimes!

Being a kid is tough. I agree with Amy when she said that your children always need to know that you stand by them and will fight tooth and nail for them. That helps more than anything.

Always let him know just how amazing you think he is - and be very specific with praise. Go easy on the "goods" and "greats" and make it something like, "I appreciate. . ." or "I noticed. . ." or "You should be proud of yourself for. . ."

Hope things get better for him!

Great card by the way!