I have been meaning to share for awhile now.
But life has taken away a lot of my computer and crafting time.
Which I am fine with.
If you have followed my blog, you know my daughter, Cortney.
She is one of the lights in my life. She is my shadow.
She has shaped me into the person I am today. Our journey together has been sad, hard, joyous, and an experience I would never in a million years trade in.
But the reality is, I won't be able to take care of her for the rest of my life.
She is as tall as me and weighs about the same as me. I struggle daily with her care. She is aging out of her school program next year and then the question became, what will we do?
In 2006 I put her name on a list for a wonderful group home called, Misericordia. The waiting list is extremely long. I knew it would be years before she were to ever be called, if ever. But in October, the call came.
They have an opening for her. She will be moving there in January.
How is it that I can feel happy and sad all at the same time? I've had well intentioned people tell me it's like she is going away to college.
Nope, not really.
Most college students can take care of themselves, and for years have screamed their independence from the rooftops. It was a gradual process with Kyle. I miss him, but in a whole different way.
Cortney has the mental capabilities of a 3 year old. I take care of her every need. She consumes much of my time each and every day.
But Misericordia has a wonderful reputation. Not one single parent or adult resident has ever said anything negative about them. In fact, they love it so much that the residents don't want to come home. They make friends, they hold a job, there are countless activities to participate in. Things I won't be able to offer her.
Cortney is social and loves school. This will become her new school.
And yet my heart is heavy.
I am losing a huge piece of my heart.
Any yet I am happy.
I know she will carve out a fabulous life there.
And I can visit anytime I want. She can still come home on weekends.
And Misericordia will become my second home too.
The people there are warm, friendly, and we are all in this together.
But still.....there will be a huge gap in my life.
An adjustment to say the least.
So pray for Cortney to acclimate to her new home.
For her mama to adjust to her absence.
For us both to find peace and balance.